What helped you make peace with this part of yourself?

Clair

For a lot of us there was a stretch of confusion or shame before any kind of acceptance.

If you've come out the other side — even partly — what helped? A person, a realisation, a piece of writing, time, this finally having a name? Share it; it might be exactly what someone reading right now needs.

And if you're still in the thick of it: it does get lighter, and you're allowed to take up space here while it does.

[deleted]

This account was deleted at the member’s request.

sebashockeya71

@[deleted]
honestly, very similar here with all of that

mrkinkybubbles

It's a slow acceptance of oneself and being into feederism there are times still where I disgust myself but, being open minded learning about it and learning to understand yourself helps greatly. Separation of fantasy and reality keeps you more grounded in your desires know what you find attractive in fantasy compared to the real world. Finding others to talk about and share your interests with helps take of pressure

[deleted]

I want to preface that I have not been in a relationship yet and I still struggle with these feelings. The advice I’m going to give won’t make the feeling disappear, but hopefully it will help.

For me it helps have an idea of what you’ll say to a future partner when telling them that you’re into feedism, and having an idea of what you want realistically in a relationship involving feedism. Finding where you draw the line can be helpful in easing your mind, as you can better allow yourself to see that being into feedism doesn’t make you an inherently bad person. A lot of the articles here provide really good insight on how to integrate it into future relationship. As long as you act in good faith, it will be reciprocated.

Also accept that future relationships involving this will be a trial by fire, and that you don’t know who you will find love with in the future. Thinking how the one you love will reject you and be disgusted by you is only looking at one aspect of yourself and POTENTIAL future. I can’t say for sure but it might be one of those things where being in a relationship with somebody might help change your perspective on the feedism for the better. Maybe it helps you and your potential spouse become closer.

Sorry if my reply is kind of rambly. Also some of the advice applies more to if you aren’t looking for a partner that is explicitly into feedism or even looking for a relationship. Still I hope it helps.

BuzzieBug

I've never really had that journey. To me it's always been just...how romance and sexuality worked. Everybody else was weird and doing it wrong.

Clair

BuzzieBug That's a good way to look at this to be honest, thank you for this perspective

ste400

i keep it to myself unless some else brings it up about the topic ,etc. but have always been at peace with it.

Max

I think what helped most was stopping the constant fight with myself. The attraction didn't disappear because I felt ashamed of it, so eventually I started trying to understand it instead of treating it like something I had to get rid of. Once I accepted that it's simply one part of my sexuality, not my entire identity, it became much easier to live with. I can acknowledge what turns me on without feeling like I have to act on every fantasy or justify it to anyone.

belleinazootsuit

I actually used to get bloated really easily, and I now attribute that feeling to anxiety. I recently went through a breakup, and I now feel those shackles are gone, a wordy way or saying i'm over it. And now I can eat all I want, and feel fine. I think I am somehow psychologically linked, my stomach and my sense of well-being.